In the world today, it seems like stress is the new normal. Rushing to get to appointments, eating fast food, working and caring for a family and no time for yourself. It all adds up to more stress.
When we go visit our horses, we can carry over this stress if we are not careful and to horses, stress from us is equal to self preseration for them. Finding tranquility for us and for our horses is so important for our health and our safety. If we are stressed, the horse is going to be looking around for what we are stressed about. It could be life or death for them. But how do we find that calm?
Our first technique for finding calm revolves around the power of sound—whether it's talking, singing, or simply humming. Sound has an incredible ability to anchor us to the present moment, soothing our minds and bodies with its rhythmic vibrations. Engaging in sound can serve as a form of meditation, guiding our focus away from turbulent thoughts and into a state of peaceful awareness. So, next time you feel overwhelmed, try tuning into your own voice and let it carry you to a place of tranquility. (My horse did try and bite my foot when I sang while riding so I now keep it to humming or talking!)
Another great tool is managing our "What If's". These hypothetical scenarios, often fueled by anxiety and fear, have a tendency to hijack our thoughts and spiral us into a state of distress. However, by consciously directing our "What If's" towards positive outcomes, we can transform them into catalysts for joy. Embracing the potential of our imaginations allows us to envision a future filled with hope and possibility, steering us away from the grip of apprehension and towards a path of serenity and enjoying riding our horses!
In essence, cultivating calmness is not an elusive feat reserved for a select few but a skill that can be honed with practice and intention by all of us. By embracing the power of sound and harnessing the potential of our thoughts, we can create tranquility and joy in our daily lives, finding the calm in the storms that threaten to overwhelm us. So, join me on this transformative journey as we discover the profound beauty of finding peace amidst chaos.
If you would like to watch episode 6 of the podcast, you can find it here! Episode 6: Create Calm with Ease
Fear is a universal experience, a primal emotion that has shaped us as humans. In my latest podcast episode, "3 Types of Fear and Why it's Important," I talk about the intricacies of fear, dissecting its various forms and shedding light on why understanding them is crucial for mastering our responses.
At the core of our discussion are the three fundamental types of fear: Real Threat, Perceived Threat, and Imaginary Threat. Each type manifests uniquely in our lives, influencing our thoughts, decisions, and actions in profound ways.
Real Threat is the fear triggered by tangible, immediate danger—a survival instinct designed to keep us safe. It's the rush of adrenaline when facing a dangerous situation. Recognizing this type of fear allows us to respond effectively, mobilizing our resources to confront or evade the danger.
Perceived Threat, on the other hand, stems from our interpretation of situations as threatening, even if they may not pose an actual risk. This form of fear often arises from past experiences, shaping our beliefs and attitudes. Understanding perceived threats empowers us to challenge irrational fears, reframe our perspectives, and cultivate resilience in the face of uncertainty.
Lastly, Imaginary Threat encompasses our imaginary fears—worries about what might happen. While seemingly benign, these fears can exert a profound influence on our mental well-being, limiting our potential and hindering personal growth. By acknowledging and confronting imaginary threats, we reclaim control over our minds, fostering courage and self-assurance. These imaginary threats also affect our physical health, not only leaving us drained but can actually cause physical health issues always being in a state of freeze, fight, or flight.
In essence, recognizing and understanding the three types of fear equips us with the tools to navigate life's challenges with confidence and resilience. Join us on this enlightening journey as we unravel the mysteries of fear and empower ourselves to embrace the unknown with courage and conviction.
My accident happened in the first 60 seconds after getting on, but it felt like a lifetime. I should have seen the signs of pain from the horse being bit by a black widow and not even put the saddle on, let alone actually mount. After the horse flipped on me, I wasn't sure I would ever ride again but riding is my passion and how could I let 60 seconds of terror hold me back from the 1000's of hours of joy I had experienced riding?
Like many of you, whether it was an accident or just the fear of getting hurt creeping in, we can let our fears hold us back from our dreams.
Here are two things you can do to reduce your fear getting on again.
1. Prepare your horse for mounting. I used to get on with my horse walking and didn't even think about it. Now, I want my horse to not only stand still for mounting, I want them to be relaxed and it they aren't, my leg does not go over their back. I love doing fencing with them. This is from Carson James. I sit on a fence or stand on the mounting block (or anything above them) and I work with them back and forth until they come up under me on both sides and stand quietly in the right position for me to mount. If they are not quiet and relaxed, I make them swing around, back and forth until they are quiet in front of me.
2. Mounting. The second thing I do is make sure I give them a cue when I am going to mount. I actually pull the saddle back and forth until they set their feet wider, so they are stable for me to get on. Once I have their feet wider, I get on. If they walk, I circle them until they stand quietly and then I get off. If they don't walk, I will just get off stepping back on the mounting block and lead them off or back them off the mounting block. I repeat this a few times until they are really sure that making their feet wider means I am getting on.
Once I am mounting again, my next goal is 4 steps!!!
Here is a link to my podcast page if you would like to hear more about mounting! (Click Here)
Looking back at my accident, and watching videos of other people's accidents, I started to put together a few thoughts. They didn't all have to happen, and the rider was the one that could have prevented the accident. This is POWERFUL. Especially for those of use with fear and anxiety. If we knew getting on our horse that we would not get hurt, our fear would melt away.
Let's create a pre-ride checklist for our horse so we know they are ready to ride and let's create one for us, the rider too! (I have some created for you as a sample if you would like, Click Here!)
First, know your horse. Spend some time writing down what your horse does right before he spooks. There are usually signs leading up to the actual spook. Figure out what his neck feels like when he is stressed and what it feels like when he is relaxed and eating. Get to know the difference. The key is to look for the subtle things, not just the big blow ups. We want to create a checklist so as we are grooming our horse, we can check to make sure they are starting out relaxed. As we are working through building our checklist, we can also play with ways to get them through the tension and relax. There are techniques like tapping and making muscles tense and then relax so the horse learns to not hold tension. Build this checklist and keep it fresh so that it will keep you safe.
The second thing is to know you. Make your own checklist. Take a moment right now and just feel your shoulders and how they feel. Then shrug your shoulders really tight up by your ears and hold for 10 or so seconds. Now relax your shoulders completely. Is there a difference between how they felt before and how they feel now? This is a great way to find relaxation and can be part of your checklist. Are you relaxed? Include on your checklist making sure your mind is relaxed and figure out things to do to relax your mind. If you have a lot of tension in your mind, your horse will feel it. Build your list with all the things you need to make sure you are the rider your horse wants you to be when you mount up.
I would love to know what you put onto your checklists if you would like to leave a comment on the blog!
I was so frustrated with trainers that told me to "Just RIDE", or "Show that horse who is BOSS", when it was me that was terrified. My horse was fine, it wasn't their fault. I remember crying and feeling so alone in my fear. They just didn't get it.
Like many of you, we are surrounded by people that are trying to help us through our fear or anxiety, but because they don't understand, their techniques make things worse.
We can do some simple things that will help us even if the people around us don't understand.
1. Put a plan in place "if" that thing you are afraid of happens. I was terrified of the horse rearing and flipping. I decided that if the horse raised its head, my trigger, I would get an ear to focus on me. Then ask the horse to move their feet. Then stop. Next flex left and flex right. Then move their feet again. I rehearsed this visually, and then in the arena before ever going for a trail ride. It gave me so much confidence! I encourage you to figure out your fear trigger and put a plan in place to work through them. Include dismounting as part of the plan if you feel unsafe.
2. Get the tools you need! This sounds really crazy, but tools can serve you well and may not be what you are thinking. I have an essential oil I use to keep me calm, I put it on my right wrist, and I have one for courage when I need to act and that I put on my left wrist. I feel like superwoman with these two working together. The calm eye of the storm and the force of the storm and I can weave my way between the two. Another tool I use is CBD, it stops the shakes but keeps my mind clear. Another tool is a handle around the neck I can grab if needed. These are all tools and each one adds a bit to my courage.
3. Security items is the third thing that brings me bravery. Helmet, life jacket (I tried the horse vests but they didn't work for me so I use my Seadoo jacket). Whatever equipment helps you feel secure are worth every penny that they cost. They help keep you safe.
In the latest episode of the Turn Riding Fear Around Podcast, I delve into the essential strategies and tools for overcoming riding fear and reclaiming the joy of the saddle. You can enjoy hearing my thoughts on the above by just clicking on the link at the bottom of my Podcast webpage or any podcast platform that you enjoy. Click here!
