I am going to share the most powerful secret I learned over 30 years ago!
I was sitting there, one cold December morning, sipping my Latte, my fancy journal and my favorite pen, ready to write my New Years Resolution, when all of a sudden, the WAVE of feeling like a failure, washed over me. I had failed every New Years resolution I had ever set.
It didn't matter what they were, I had failed them all. Going to the gym 5 times a week, Eating Healthy. Running 5 mornings a week, not one. I was a failure. If you have ever failed a new years resolution, you are not alone.
As I sat there, reflecting back on those failures, I began to dig. What did I want from those resolutions? The more I contemplated, the start of a tiny light began to glow. They would make me healthy. Ok, But what did I get from being healthy? I would be happy, I would be Joyful!!!
That is when I hit on the secret, it wasn't about the actions, it was about the feeling. The feeling of joy!
When was the last time you felt joy, true joy? Take yourself back to the last time you truly felt joy. For me, it was when I was a kid!
Why did I feel joyful as a kid? I LAUGHED. All day. At everything. How could I turn that into a resolution? I needed to set a goal to LAUGH 400 times a day, big enough not to measure, I am an Engineer and like to measure, and also big enough to keep me striving for joy!
As riders, our mental state is so important and the more we can find our joy, the more our horses don't have to carry our mental burden when we are with them. The more they can enjoy us and not just tune us out. You know, it might be the same with our family and friends. Imagine being around someone that is filled with joy, that would feel good!
If you are looking for a little more joy in your life, Click here to get my free guide, 3 STEPS TO ENJOY LIFE MORE!
To carry on with my thoughts from the other day, Fear to Courage FB Group Post!
It really got me thinking, how common are horse accidents? I did quite a bit of research and there are a lot of different ways to look at it. I like the study from OSU extension office. It was based on 1000 hours of participation in sports versus injury. I actually was a little shocked to see that riding was just ahead of cycling, swimming and golf, and behind everything else! Football was the worst, baseball and downhill skiing were more injuries than horseback riding.
Some of the things that I found really interesting in my research are that the oldest participants in most Olympics are the riders. This means that even at this level of competition, there is a lot of success as we age. When I was young, I had dreams of competing at the Olympics and I remember the Los Angeles games and my trainer got to be ring crew. I was so excited to watch the ground crew! I didn't have enough talent to get to that level of competition, but it sure did look amazing. I love that it is one of the few sports that men and women compete against each other, the horses are the equalizer.
So back to how common are horse accidents. More research showed that with the safety measures that are now in place, the MIPS helmets, vests, etc, the severity of the injuries has been reduced. This is great news. I know I love my MIPS helmet! It fits amazing. This is the one I have and love! Click here to check it out!
What about compared to other things, not sports related? It was a lot harder to find research, so I am just going with my experience. I have had 5 or 6 concussions. None of these were riding. One was horse related when I was picking out feet and stood up under the cross bar in the cross ties and knocked myself out and gave myself a concussion. I have not had any broken bones (knock on wood) but if I had, it would have been from a number of things not horse related. Skiing has been my biggest downfall. I had to have surgery on my knee and had my neck severely damaged from being hit by a snowmobile.
I am going to share more on my thoughts on how all of these ties into our fear and why horses cause us anxiety when the other stuff may or may not have the same impact. I still ski after my accidents. I still pick out feet after my accident (and even learned to trim). I still drive after my accidents that were not my fault.
This is a very interesting question, and I am sure there are a million answers. Just as with all life, the most critical fear is dying. In a lot of ways, they are blessed. They don't have to be afraid of losing their job, losing their money, IRS tax audit, or any of the other fears and stresses that humans put on themselves. They have one mission, to live through the day.
Their fears stem from anything that is new, that they need to figure out if it is going to kill them. I was standing near the horses one day in the pasture, when a plastic bag went blowing on the wind, all around them and under their legs. They didn't move. When I saw it coming, my fear level went up, and they all started to react, but when I saw this, I just completely relaxed, and they did too. They were not afraid of the bag. They were afraid that I might be afraid of the bag.
Horses survival depends on not being the horse that is most afraid, but they need to not be the slowest to react. The horse that is not in tune to the rest of the herd and danger vibes, will be the horse that doesn't make it, that is food for the predator.
Are they afraid of the predator? No. This shocked me. A friend of mine was working Africa and had the great opportunity to observe lions and the herds. The lions would walk right through the herds to the water and back and nobody would even raise their head. They were not afraid of the lions. Then, when the lioness would start to hunt, at the moment that the first herd animal felt that energy, the warning would go out, and they would all run.
They were not afraid of the predator; they were afraid of the energy of being hunted. This is useful information. We can be that calm leader, that doesn't jump at every little thing, and our horses will start to see us as leader and trust us to keep them safe. The more our energy is calm and aware, the more the horse can relax and let us lead. Wishy washy, anxiety, and fear are not the energies of a leader.
If you enjoyed this, I talk a little more about my journey out of fear and back to courage in my book, would love to have you check it out! Click here!
How often do people get hurt riding horses is such an interesting question. There is so much fear and anxiety around getting hurt riding horses, but I wonder, if the hours spent worrying are more than the hours spent actually recovering from an injury. I am just going to go with my experience and share with you.
My first pony, an unbroke 2-year-old Shetland pony stallion, that we gelded, and I trained to trail ride, when I was 5, I fell off once. I had probably an hour a day with him, for a year and a half, so let's go conservative and say 300 hours. The one time I fell off, he had just had his feet trimmed and he jumped over me to keep from stepping on me and clipped the back of my head. It was 5 stitches and no recovery time. So let's say 5 hours of injury recovery.
My second pony, also a 2-year-old unbroke, but this time, POA filly. When I was about 9, I actually had to stop counting because I had been bucked off over 480 times. Having her for 3 years, and hundreds of hours of riding, and 480 times hitting the dirt, I had no injuries, just depressed from not being able to stay on her. We even had a mountain lion attack us once and we both made it home without her bucking me off! No injuries.
I think my next 6 or 7 horses, from when I was 10 until I was 24 or 25, I didn't have any falls or accidents. I competed in hunters, equitation, worked on a ranch riding their horses, trail riding, etc. and would have added up to 1000's of hours of riding. I then had a fall in a jumper class, no injuries, got back on and competed in the next class. I had a few more falls here and there but no injuries. Then, I had my major accident which I talk about in my book. That one still didn't have any injuries other than bruising, to my physical body but it was the start of the emotional battle.
So here are my thoughts. The more time spent in the saddle, the less chance of getting injured. You get more in tune with your horse, with you, and with your reactions. So, if getting back into riding, start out slow, and build on the riding. Accidents do happen. So prepare your body the best that you can. I take care of my health. My skin was getting thin, I fixed it. My body was getting stiff and sore, I fixed it. I was gaining a little weight, I fixed it. I have a passion to ride. I want to ride. I love to ride. The thousands of hours of joy are worth the chance of getting hurt, but I also do everything in my power to eliminate the risks.
If you are intersted in hearing more about how I have improved my health, here is a link to the amazing coaching program and support group that I am part of. Would love to have you join us! Get Healthy Now!
Sitting on the hillside, with the sun on my back, and just the amazing feeling all the way to the center of the earth was how I used to spend my lunch times. It was an overlook for a whole stand of eucalyptus trees that seemed to go on forever. The leaves would shimmer and the trees would sway. As I watched, I could see the energy of the wind, blow from one side of the field to the other side of the field and swirl around in between. I was mesmerized by being able to watch the energy of the wind.
Laying down in the lush moss, beside a creek with the sun and shadows all around. I could see the water swirling around rocks and moving faster in the skinnier areas and slow and steady in the wider areas of the creek. I could see the energy of the water.
Sitting there this morning, watching the horses in the pasture, moving around, and being horses. Binky laid down and had a great roll. While she was laying down, Michelle joined her, really getting into the dirt and dust and putting all her effort into the roll. Taika was pickier, looking for a place to lay down and circling the spots that looked good. Before Taika could lay down, and while Binky was sitting on her way up from her roll, Michelle jumped up and ran, bucking! That intense energy I could feel and both Binky and Taika joined in. They circled the pasture a few times, bucking and playing. Swinging their heads and exuding pure joy. I realized I was feeling and watching the energy of beings. I had the privilege, even though there was a distance between us, of feeling their energy and being part of it.
I have thought about energy and how it pushes and/or pulls things to us or away from us. These visuals of energy are real. They can be felt and seen. I hate sleeping with a fan on, that steady dribble of fake wind. I love sleeping with the windows open and feeling the touch of the breeze on my cheeks. I have played with magnets, repelling each other or attracting each other. I have played with a horse and our hearts, liberty lunging with no physical connection.
Play with your energy. Observe the energy all around you. Anxiety and joy are energies that can't exist in the same place, practice the energy of joy.
If you have enjoyed this, check out my free PDF - Five Energy Games to play with your horse!
