Confidence can go out with a bang, or a buck, or it can gently slip away like the flow of a creek. Either way, losing confidence can rob the joy from riding our precious horses. After a horrible accident, mine went out with a bang. It then, slowly slipped away, further and further until it seemed completely out of reach. I had to make the decision to get it back and enjoy riding again. Here are three steps that really helped me.
The first step is making the decision. It would have been so easy to listen to the others and to my fear. I was getting too old, I don't bounce like I used to, I might get hurt and so many others. I really evaluated the joy I was missing from not riding and that made all the difference. I made the decision to ride again. That decision wasn't easy but it was so rewarding. I was done letting a lack of confidence rob me of hundreds of hours of joy riding.
The second step is to put an action plan in place. Look at the fear and do what is needed to be done to turn that into a success. Everyone's fear is different so write yours down, evaluate the fear, take action to help the fear get smaller and the confidence grow. One of my fears, getting hurt, is an easy one to look at as a sample. What actions could I take to improve my confidence that I wouldn't get hurt. Action 1 = make sure my horses were safe for me, my level of riding. Action 2 = get MIPS helmet and a vest. Action 3 = improve my balance and flexibility. It was a huge confidence boost to have a plan and see that I could implement it.
The third step is to think like an airplane pilot. Pilots have a complete checklist they go through before they ever take the plane down the runway. They do this every single time. Put together your plan, your checklist. Use it. Follow it. Put things in that make you know you are ready and things so that you know on that day, at that time, your horse is ready. If you would like some help with this, I have a whole session in my Fear to Courage Virtual Clinic that walks through my pre-ride checklist for myself and my horse. This was so important for me to get my courage back. Knowing when it is ok to get on and when it isn't. (You can find out more information about the virtual clinic here.)
If you would like to hear a little about my journey to courage, I share some thoughts that might resonate with you, in this video. Click here to watch the video!
