I started to write about riding horses if you really want to ride horses. Don't let anything stop you. I was going to give a pep talk on making it happen. But then I realized, the loss of confidence can turn into feeling like riding would be a chore, at least it did for me. So I changed course and decided to write about how to have fun riding again. I have had so much fun and thinking about it, helps me want to get on and ride!
First of all, riding a horse, is all about the connection to your very best friend. It is like going to the mall and shopping with your bestie, only riding a horse takes that connection one step further to actually feeling the rhythm between the two of you physically. Hearts connected and bodies connected. That feeling of pure joy as the two of you see the sights together.
With that in mind, riding can be fun for both of you. I spent most of my hours riding as a kid, riding trails and playing, almost no time in an arena. We would race each other and even race motorcycles. We would jump over anything and everything that we could find. I think my favorite was playing tag in the heat of summer. We would swim in the ponds and if our horses touched the ground, we were out and had to sit out in the heat until everyone was out. We would do this for 8 or 9 hours. I think back now to our poor horses swimming for hours but I think they enjoyed not being in the 100 degree heat.
As an adult, I love to play "I Spy", "Red Rover", and tag (having the horse touch all kinds of stuff while I am riding). I also love a good jumper competition but the arena work can feel too much like work! What are two or three things you can do to make riding more fun for you? Think about them, picture them, get excited about having that fun on your horse again. It will help overcome the confidence issues as you bring joy into your thoughts of riding, more and more.
Picture what that fun will look like. Develop that picture and share that picture with your horse. The more you can imagine that fun, the better you will feel about riding.
Why is horseback riding fun? I would love to hear the number one thing you would enjoy having fun with your horse! Whether it is riding or not riding, not everyone wants to ride.
If you enjoyed this and would like to see some fun ways to ground play with your horse, you can get my guide, 5 Fabulous Ground Play Challenges here!
If you have the right horse for you, yes! A lot of riding anxiety comes from mismatched horse and rider. We feel like we are giving up if we sell the horse to a better home for that horse, but I think it is just the opposite.
If a horse isn't a good fit for a person, and we keep them, the horse feels bad that it isn't right. I have sold a few that were not good fits for me, and they blossomed in their new homes. It was hard for me to watch but so rewarding all at the same time.
Horses don't want to hurt us, once we are herd members. Bonding with the horse and learning how to communicate with each horse is so important.
There are horses that are more timid, communicating with them can require a little more finesses but it is amazing to see them gain confidence through clear, quiet communication.
Horses that are more outgoing and maybe even aggressive, require more confidence and "louder" communication. Timing is so important to really show them that you are a partner and can be trusted to lead.
If we let our horses, they will teach us how to relax, breath, ride. In the time since my accident, I have learned so much about my own courage, my fears, and the things that work for me to gain courage. (I share this journey back to courage in my book if you would be interested in reading the whole story, click here). When I get on, if I tense up, I can feel them tense up. I can practice breathing, especially, exhaling, to calm me and feel the horse calm too. I started out with taking four steps. I felt like I was on cloud nine after those first four steps back. Sounds silly, but it was huge for me.
As we build our courage, it will carry over to all areas of our lives. I have become braver in all areas of my life. I am more confident with work, with speaking up for me, with sharing my fears and my successes with others to help them along. I never would have written two books if it wasn't for this amazing journey back to courage and this was enabled by my horses. wasn't for this amazing journey back to courage and this was enabled by my horses.
