Can laughing get rid of anxiety?

Can laughing get rid of anxiety?
How many New Year's resolutions have you not completed or accomplished?  Honestly, who came up with resolutions anyway?  I remember the stress level that I felt for the first few months of the year when I was striving to get off on a good foot accomplishing my resolutions for the year.  

Thirty years ago, I decided that I didn't want the stress of trying to meet this random thing I felt like I should be doing to fit in.  I changed it up and decided that I wanted to "feel" better, each and every day for the year, but how?  For me, I came up with the idea of 400 laughs a day.  It is too big a number to track and yet, it is big enough to really strive for things to laugh at, all day long.  

Here are the benefits I am finding from making this change:
1. I feel better.  I am healthier.  Laughter really does change your physiology and lightens your burden.
2. Stress reduction - I got rid of the stress of trying to do something that wasn't for me.  I think most of that stress was "fitting in" but some of it was actually finding the time and doing whatever thing I thought I should be doing.
3. Choice - The more I laugh, the more people around me laugh, the more the world just seems to be a better place.  Laughing is a choice and it is a much better choice for me than anger.
4. Anxiety reduction - this was very powerful for me.  One of the things I laugh at the most was my encounter with the dentist.  I am petrified of the dentist.  I was sitting in the chair, getting a crown, and when they finished and handed me the mirror, I couldn't move my arm.  Immediately, I started to get hot, I could feel me stress level going up.  Did the dentist paralyze me?  What was going on?  The dentist started to get concerned and then realized, he had glued my arm to my leg.  It was in that moment that I couldn't help laughing hysterically.  It felt great and, in that moment, it significantly reduced my anxiety for the dentist.  Laughter really does reduce or get rid of anxiety!

If you have ever wondered how to get a little more laughter into your life, I wrote a book that has some of my favorites!  If you are interested, click here for more information.


Can horses feel when you are nervous?

Can horses feel when you are nervous?
Picture yourself, as a zebra, in the middle of the herds grazing in Africa.  It is a beautiful day, light breeze blowing, the other zebras are quietly munching on the green grass around you.  A lion creeps into the edge of the meadow, searching for lunch.  A zebra on the edge of herd, feels the tension in the air and sounds the alarm, racing away from where it feels the danger.  All the herd runs except you keep eating the lush grass and don't "FEEL" the danger.  You would be lunch.

Horses are no different.  Their instincts require that they feel the energy around them.  Their life depends on it.

Are there things we can do that will help reduce our nerves and help our horses to remain calm?  Yes, but the one thing I have found with horses that doesn't work very well is "Fake it 'til you make it".  They can feel your energy while you are trying to fake it unless you can actually shift your energy and then you aren't really faking it.

1. Practice getting your nerves stressed and bringing them back down.  Exactly what we do when we desensitize our horses, we can also do for us.  Sit in a comfy chair, close your eyes, and picture something you fear.  Feel your stress start to increase.   Practice breathing in a square or circle.  With the square, I like breath in for count of 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4, focus on this count until you feel great again.  The other one I like is picturing my breathing is a Ferris wheel, going in a circle.  The most critical is to not hold your breath.  Make sure you practice exhaling.
2. Visualize an amazing time with your horse.  I like to picture myself as the eye of the storm, strong, powerful and calm.  I love practicing this while I am with my horses, they relax and change when I am that calm energy.
3. I use CBD for my first rides back after a break.  It really helps to take the edge off and if the horses get nervous, I use a brand that will also help them.  Most is not approved for horses; it took me a while to find one for both of us.  (Click here if you would like to check it out).

I would love to be able to feel what other energies are around me like horses do.  I think it would be fascinating.

If you have enjoyed this, you might enjoy my 3 ways to stop panic guide!  Click here if you would like a copy.

Can Horses Help to Get Over Riding Anxiety?

Can Horses Help to Get Over Riding Anxiety?

If you have the right horse for you, yes!  A lot of riding anxiety comes from mismatched horse and rider.  We feel like we are giving up if we sell the horse to a better home for that horse, but I think it is just the opposite.  

 

If a horse isn't a good fit for a person, and we keep them, the horse feels bad that it isn't right.  I have sold a few that were not good fits for me, and they blossomed in their new homes.  It was hard for me to watch but so rewarding all at the same time.

 

Horses don't want to hurt us, once we are herd members.  Bonding with the horse and learning how to communicate with each horse is so important.

 

There are horses that are more timid, communicating with them can require a little more finesses but it is amazing to see them gain confidence through clear, quiet communication.  

 

Horses that are more outgoing and maybe even aggressive, require more confidence and "louder" communication.  Timing is so important to really show them that you are a partner and can be trusted to lead.

 

If we let our horses, they will teach us how to relax, breath, ride.  In the time since my accident, I have learned so much about my own courage, my fears, and the things that work for me to gain courage. (I share this journey back to courage in my book if you would be interested in reading the whole story, click here).  When I get on, if I tense up, I can feel them tense up.  I can practice breathing, especially, exhaling, to calm me and feel the horse calm too.  I started out with taking four steps.  I felt like I was on cloud nine after those first four steps back.  Sounds silly, but it was huge for me.

 

As we build our courage, it will carry over to all areas of our lives.  I have become braver in all areas of my life.  I am more confident with work, with speaking up for me, with sharing my fears and my successes with others to help them along. I never would have written two books if it wasn't for this amazing journey back to courage and this was enabled by my horses. wasn't for this amazing journey back to courage and this was enabled by my horses.


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How Do I Get Over Riding Fear?

How Do I Get Over Riding Fear?

How to get over horse riding fear depends on what type of fear you are feeling.  When I first heard this, it made so much sense to really delve into what type of fear I was feeling and base the answer on the type of fear.

 

The first type is real fear.  This is the fear I feel when my horse starts bucking or rearing.  This is the type of fear when I am riding along and see a poisonous snake.  This is the type of fear when I am riding along, and a mountain lion drops onto the tail of my horse.  All of these fears I have experienced first-hand.  The answer to getting over this type of fear is to take action.  In these moments, I have to "DO" something. If my horse is bucking, I have to get her to stop.  A snake, I need to go around it.  The mountain lion, I had to hang on for dear life until I got home.  Action is required.

 

The second type of fear is perceived fear.  This is when riding along and seeing what looks like a poisonous snake ahead and it is a tree limb.  This is saddling up and having the wind pick up and blowing the trees around.  This is having the horse slip and thinking they are bucking.  This type of fear requires thinking, evaluation, determination if the fear is real and necessary.  If the snake turns out to be a tree branch, no action necessary.  With the wind blowing, adjust the ride to stay out from under trees that might have branches falling.  Feel the horse and realize that it wasn't a buck but just the horse slipping.  In all of these, action may or may not need to be taken but it isn't immediate.

 

The third type of fear and the one we practice the most, is imaginary fear.  This is the "What if's".  This is the imagination running wild with all the things that might happen.  This robs us of our joy.  This robs our horses of knowing that we are present.  This is the one that we can overcome!  If you are going to use your imagination, pick the "What If's" that you actually want!  It takes practice but why not?  What if my ride is glorious?  What if my horse and I really connect on the ride and have a ton of fun?  We get to pick and choose our what if's so why not pick the ones that we want to have happen?

 

If you have enjoyed hearing my thoughts on fear, you might enjoy my free guide: 3 Ways to Stop Panic


Can Forgiveness be Part of the Key to Getting Over Horse Riding Anxiety?

Can Forgiveness be Part of the Key to Getting Over Horse Riding Anxiety?

Feeling lost with your anxiety and fear is hard.  The feelings of not being good enough, not being able to ride, letting fear get in the way, and most importantly, knowing that your horse is feeling your anxiety, are the hardest feelings ever.

 

We forget what it felt like to ride in joy.  We forget the amazing feelings of the saddle and the motion of the horse.  The shaking, holding our breath, and just all the things that take over with anxiety feel like they possess us.  All of these feelings are natural and normal with fear and anxiety.

 

There is something we can do about it.  Forgiveness.  Take some time to forgive yourself.  This was so hard for me.  I kept going back to all the things I did wrong, not only with the accident, but also with letting my health go, my flexibility diminish, and the anxiety controlling me.  I had to forgive all of this. 

 

I made a list of all the things.  I hate to admit it, but there was a lot on the list I was carrying around on my shoulders.  I started at the top of the list and started forgiving myself for each thing on the list.  It didn't mean I was forgetting, it just felt good to know I had made mistakes, I was going to do better, and I could go to my heart and forgive me.

 

Forgiveness looks different for everyone but here is a sample of what I worked through and how I felt.

 

I missed the signs of a horse in pain before my accident.  I carried this heavy weight with me, it must have been terrifying for him.  I forgive myself.  I did not know he was in pain.  I forgive myself.  I did not mean to hurt him or cause him pain.  I forgive myself.  I learned and have a pre-ride checklist so it never happens again.  Feeling this forgiveness, was a weight lifted off my shoulders and with the checklist, it removes anxiety that it will happen again.

 

Do you have things you need to forgive yourself for?


If you would like to work on this further, click here for my free - Ghost of Anxiety - past, present, future.

 
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