That quickness of breath, the sweaty palms, the tension rising in the body happens to me when I think about my accident. The interesting thing is watching my horses and realizing that they also feel the memories of accidents. I can see their neck arch, their breathing increases, maybe even to the point of snorting, and their whole-body fills with tension.
I am so good at working with my horses, to help them overcome their memories of accidents. But I wasn't as good at doing the same thing for me and I really started to look at the differences. With my horses, I would teach them to relax. I have a few favorite tools that I use to get them "up" and then I show them how to relax. I have to change their memory of what happened by showing them a different way to be, showing them, they are in control of their emotion.
Wow, showing them control. That is also the key for us, or at least it was for me. I looked back at the accident, and I dissected it. What led up to it? How did it happen? Were there signs I could have seen before it happened? Even if I didn't know the answers, I could put the things in place to at least going forward, control the pre-accident situation.
It was so powerful to put the pieces into place to know that I had prepared myself to prevent future accidents. Can they still happen, yes, but that feeling of control helped in the recovery from the accident mentally. It built my confidence and courage and allowed me to continue enjoying riding. I really thought about a car accident I had; did it stop me from driving? Why let the horse accident stop me from riding?
The pieces I put in place are my pre-ride checklists. One for the rider, is my mind right. And one for the horse, are they ready to be ridden. I feel like a pilot checking out an airplane before a flight. It is methodical. It is predefined. They follow it exactly, every time they fly. It prevents accidents to the best of the ability. We can do the same for riding our horses and bring a piece of mind, even after an accident.
If you enjoyed this, you might enjoy my free guide: 3 Ways to Stop Panic
This applies to so many things in life! What if I lose my job, my money, my health, etc.? There are so many things in life that can pull us into the "What if" bucket. Horses and people that have had an accident with a horse, seem to send the what if imagination into overdrive. How do we turn that around?
Here are my thoughts.
1. It takes observation! When we notice we have a negative what if thought, about anything, switch it to something positive. Example: What if I fall off my horse? STOP! Change it to What if I have an amazing, relaxing ride! What if's haven't happened yet, so why not pick things that make us feel good instead of picking stuff that makes us feel bad?
2. We can practice. Sit on your couch, or better yet, lay down in the yard watching the clouds go by, doesn't matter but get comfortable. Bring up your BIG what if. Think about it. Notice how you emotionally feel. Notice how you physically feel. Then create an amazing what if. Put a lot of detail into it. Put all your senses into it. Example: What if we have a lovely ride. We are in sync, and I can feel the rhythm of my horse's feet. We feel like we are dancing together, as one. We soak up the sunshine and can feel the light breeze on our cheeks. After you do this, really feel the difference. Physically and emotionally.
3. Look at the root of your what if's. Was it a memory, is it imagination? What is the base to your what if. Once you have that, make a choice to change it. For me, my root was an accident. I focused on changing the memory of my accident, into a vivid cartoon. Now, when I think what if my horse flips, I laugh. I see Wile-E-Coyote and the Road Runner.
Most importantly, live your life with joy. If you enjoy riding, or used to, find a way to get back into the saddle and enjoy!
If you would like to see the process I went through, here is a link to my book about my journey back to courage and getting over my "What if's"! Get the book now!
It was a warm day, riding along, enjoying our horses, when all of a sudden, a hot air balloon comes up over the horizon. It is about 50 feet from us and is loud. I had no idea how loud a balloon can be when they are heating the air. I jumped at the sight of the balloon! My horse and I panicked and ran the other direction. This was a case where my fear definitely contributed to the horse's fear! It took both of us a while to calm our heart rate and for me to stop shaking.
Let's look at this from hindsight and what I know now.
After attending a police clinic training, I don't think I would have panicked. My horse still might have, but I don't think I would have. The first thing they talked about, was focusing on where you are going, about a hundred feet ahead of you and ride to that spot. At about the 50 foot mark, adjust your focus out to 100 feet again and repeat. I think by focusing on where you are heading, your horse has confidence in you as a leader that you know where you are going. I have started playing "I spy" with my horses and it is really fun and helps me focus.
I believe that if I had been focusing that day, and not just dilly dallying around, we would not have spooked. So, if my fear contributes to a horses fear, I am going to also say, that my confidence builds confidence in the horse and the horse's confidence in me as leader. For horses, the leader is who keeps them from dying, keeps them safe. It is that way for us too, but we may not recognize it.
Does Rider Confidence help Horse Confidence? I would say yes, it really does help.
If you have enjoyed this and would like a few tips on how I built my confidence, check out my 3 Ways to Build Courage with Your Horse!
I have heard so many people ask, what are the risks of horse riding, or isn't it risky or dangerous to ride a horse?
The answer is yes, it is risky. I think most people fear getting hurt and that is the risk that can hold them back.
When I look back at the 1000's of hours, I have spent riding, I have had a few injuries while actually riding them, a few more being around them, and thankfully, none of them, for me, were serious physically. There have been a few that impacted my anxiety and fear more than the physical injury. But then I look back at all the things I do that are risky, and not involving horses, and really, they don't bring me the joy that riding does so there are tradeoffs.
I have been kicked. I have been bitten. I have been bucked off, I quit counting at 483 because it was too depressing. I have had a mountain lion jump on the butt of my pony and we both lived to tell about it. I have been jumped out of the saddle over a 4' oxer and knocked myself out on the withers coming back down and fallen off (in front of Bill Gates!). I have had a horse run backwards and flip over on top of me. It took me a while to think of all of this, but I did want you to see that there is risk.
Now for the flipside. I have ridden to the tops of mountains for a BBQ lunch and spectacular views. I have spent countless hours, training and jumping, to compete in 100's of horse shows. I have won medals, ribbons, coolers, flowers, and an assortment of other trinkets. I have enjoyed many hours of trails and incredible sights. I swam with the horses all summer in the heat. I have learned how to have a partnership with another being. I have felt the wind in my hair (before helmets were a safety net) while galloping on any areas that were straight and flat. I have ridden in a mounted drill team. The hours of joy far outweigh any risks for me. The feeling of being one with the horse and flying over the ground are the most rewarding things ever.
As my mom would say, horses are in my blood, might as well enjoy them!
If you want to tame your anxiety, and would like some help, I wrote a book about my journey back from fear to courage that has the process I used to enjoy riding again. Just click here!
I have a small community that supports those of us wanting to conquer our fear, would love to have you join us! Free Courage Group!
This is so filled with controversy! I am going to try and share all sides of this. So, I guess I am saying, it depends.
From my experience, there are so many areas of "horses" that tones my stomach and riding is only one of them. Did you see the movie Karate Kid? Wax on, wax off? Well, when I groom my horses, it works and tones all the stomach muscles. My horses are 16'2, 1300 pounds, and they lean into grooming. That means I lean back. I use two brushes or two mitts at the same time so I get double the workout. I would definitely say that if you want grooming to tone your stomach, than yes, it can.
The second area that tones my stomach is mucking, or any chores. I really focus on my core lifting the fork and then lifting and carrying the muck bucket. Carrying bales of hay and feed buckets. Pulling weeds in the pasture (bonus 100's of squats on this one). All are great for working on your core, if you focus on those muscles as you do the work.
Now for the original question, does horse riding tone your stomach?
Well, this depends. I have been on both sides of this. Ok, there are probably many sides to this but here are my two. Riding jumpers uses the abs. I definitely tone my stomach training and showing jumpers. When I don't ride for a bit, boy, I feel my abs after I ride again. The other end of the spectrum is a lovely relaxing trail ride. I think I still used my abs some, since when I did most of my trail riding, it was bareback. But nothing like jumping. I think there are ways to use and tone the core no matter what riding you do if you place focus on it. Even trail riding, if you do lateral work on the trail, moving the horse to the right and then to the left, you could engage your core.
I think a lot of it is what you are focusing on while riding and if you are trying to tone your stomach.
If you would like some ideas on grooming (#2 is what I do for my core and my horses coat), just click here to get my free guide, 3 Ways to Keep Your Horses Coat and Skin Healthy!
