Fear

Do Horses Know if You are Scared? I have PROOF!

Oct 27, 2022 03:39 PM Central
Elise Hittinger
Fear, Horses
0 Comments

The horses were happily munching their breakfast today. The wind was swirling around, and a bunch of little dust devils were blowing through carrying the fall leaves for a ride. I was cleaning the three-sided shed as while I listened to them munching. Then I heard a crazy noise.

All around the horses' legs, feet, faces, etc, was a packaging pillow. One of those air-filled pillow sacks had blown off our porch and was dancing with the horses. I heard it first for a while and then I looked. The horses had not moved. They were happily munching away with it battering around beneath them. I started to panic but it was only a split second. I completely relaxed. In that split second, they all three lifted their heads, looked at me, and then because I had relaxed again, they all just went back to breakfast. I know if I had panicked, they would have too. I know because I was able to just forget about it and enjoy the show, they were fine.

There are so many times, when our emotions get in the way, and we are not even aware. Leading Michelle, a few weeks ago, and thinking she was going to run me over had her convinced something was chasing both of us. Playing with Michelle with the flag, she was in a panic. I set it down on the ground and walked away, she walked right up and played with it.

I have done this riding so many times too! It is so powerful to change our thoughts and feelings around to the positive. To the amazing rides, the amazing partnership with our horses, and truly step into that feeling of being the leader, the safe place for the horses, for our little herd.

How? We start by playing the what if game with amazing things that could happen. We fill ourselves up with amazing ride feelings until there is no room for fear to creep in. We can even pretend to be a trainer that we admire if we want! Whatever it takes, if we want to ride, we can make it happen.

If you would like to see a few more ideas I have for feeling better about our rides, Click here.

How Does Fear Spread?

Oct 12, 2022 08:26 PM Central
Elise Hittinger
Fear, Horses
0 Comments

Watching the horses graze, soaking up the sun, sharing the calm all around them, I realized that calm and fear cannot exist in the space. There are of course exceptions but in general, this is true. So how does this calm scene turn into a place of fear? How does the fear spread and why is it important for riders?

We had a tree fall in our pasture and I didn't know directly since I couldn't see the tree, I knew from the horses' panic that something was wrong. I felt fear. I felt their fear and added my fear to it. All three horses were running, fleeing for their lives in their mind. There are so many examples of this and watching a herd can be a tremendous learning opportunity.

Let's back up and look at this closer. The tree probably cracked a bit, which would have had the horses looking. One horse may have lifted their head first, and then the others followed. Then, as the tree fell and made noise, they ran away from the noise. This is a great thing; it kept the tree from falling on them. It truly was a matter of life and death, and they chose life. When they no longer heard the noise, they stopped, turned and looked at the tree. Very quickly, their heads went down, and they returned to grazing. Nature at its finest.

I talked a little bit about the fear behind me, when I thought Michelle was going to run me over. She reacted by thinking something was behind "US" that was going to eat us, so she tried to run me over. Once I realized the nonsense and filled up with confidence, she walked along behind me quietly and looked to me to lead. There is so much of this in riding as well. If we are looking around for what might scare our horse, guess what they are looking around for? This is why the police clinic teaching was so important. FOCUS 100 feet ahead on where you are going and completely ignore everything else. They have to ignore all the rioting, bottles being thrown at them, etc and they never know what that thing is going to be so they can't desensitize to everything. They have to FOCUS on what they want, where they are going, and what they are doing and the horses feel that confidence.

It can be so hard at first to feel that confidence and have that focus. I had to use a few tools to help me out (you can check them out here if you would like), and that got me over the hump. Once I had a few confident rides, I had more confidence, and it was like an amazing snowball of becoming the leader I used to be.

If you enjoyed this, here are a few exercises to help build that confidence so our horses can feel it! Ghosts of Anxiety - Past, Present, Future

Can Horses Sense Fear? I have proof!

Oct 5, 2022 07:51 PM Central
Elise Hittinger
Confidence, Fear, Horses
0 Comments

It was a really windy day. Tarps and boxes were blowing around and the noise from the leaves in the trees was like a freight train. I took Michelle for a walk because other than the wind, the day was gorgeous. I thought it would be good to practice walking behind me at the end of the lead rope.

Up the hill, she was so good. She stayed back and we had a great walk. Around the corner of the pasture, we kept walking and voila, the cardboard flew off the car trailer right next to us. It gave us a great opportunity to do some work and ignore the cardboard. She did very well but I could tell I was at her threshold.

We turned to walk back to the pasture gate. She was at the end of the lead rope behind me, but I could tell she was a powder keg by now. I kept checking over my shoulder to make sure she didn't run me over and she escalated some more. I checked more. Then, BAM, it hit me. Can horses sense fear? YES!

She didn't know I was worried about her running me over. She thought I was worried about what was behind us, the cardboard, attacking. When I had that realization, I immediately started walking confidently just like I had on the way out. It was a drastic difference for her. She immediately blew out and started to relax. She followed along at the end of the lead rope, and I knew she wasn't going to run me over. I was confident. I needed to be her leader, not the person afraid of being run over. As soon as I let go of the fear behind me, she let go of the fear behind her and we had a lovely walk back to the pasture.

As I was reviewing this later, I realized that the fear of what is behind us is far more than just in that moment. My fear of my accident in 2000 was a fear of what was behind me, in the past. There are so many fears that we carry along that are behind us. These fears are an anchor holding us back from living life to the fullest. Drop the anchors, raise the sails and become the captain of your life!

Can horses feel when you are nervous?

Jul 14, 2022 08:18 PM Central
Elise Hittinger
Anxiety, Fear, Horses
0 Comments

Picture yourself, as a zebra, in the middle of the herds grazing in Africa. It is a beautiful day, light breeze blowing, the other zebras are quietly munching on the green grass around you. A lion creeps into the edge of the meadow, searching for lunch. A zebra on the edge of herd, feels the tension in the air and sounds the alarm, racing away from where it feels the danger. All the herd runs except you keep eating the lush grass and don't "FEEL" the danger. You would be lunch.

Horses are no different. Their instincts require that they feel the energy around them. Their life depends on it.

Are there things we can do that will help reduce our nerves and help our horses to remain calm? Yes, but the one thing I have found with horses that doesn't work very well is "Fake it 'til you make it". They can feel your energy while you are trying to fake it unless you can actually shift your energy and then you aren't really faking it.

1. Practice getting your nerves stressed and bringing them back down. Exactly what we do when we desensitize our horses, we can also do for us. Sit in a comfy chair, close your eyes, and picture something you fear. Feel your stress start to increase. Practice breathing in a square or circle. With the square, I like breath in for count of 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4, focus on this count until you feel great again. The other one I like is picturing my breathing is a Ferris wheel, going in a circle. The most critical is to not hold your breath. Make sure you practice exhaling.

2. Visualize an amazing time with your horse. I like to picture myself as the eye of the storm, strong, powerful and calm. I love practicing this while I am with my horses, they relax and change when I am that calm energy.

3. I use CBD for my first rides back after a break. It really helps to take the edge off and if the horses get nervous, I use a brand that will also help them. Most is not approved for horses; it took me a while to find one for both of us. (Click here if you would like to check it out).

I would love to be able to feel what other energies are around me like horses do. I think it would be fascinating.

If you have enjoyed this, you might enjoy my 3 ways to stop panic guide! Click here if you would like a copy.

Can Horses Help to Get Over Riding Anxiety?

Jun 16, 2022 08:53 PM Central
Elise Hittinger
Anxiety, Fear, horsebackriding, Horses
0 Comments

If you have the right horse for you, yes! A lot of riding anxiety comes from mismatched horse and rider. We feel like we are giving up if we sell the horse to a better home for that horse, but I think it is just the opposite.

If a horse isn't a good fit for a person, and we keep them, the horse feels bad that it isn't right. I have sold a few that were not good fits for me, and they blossomed in their new homes. It was hard for me to watch but so rewarding all at the same time.

Horses don't want to hurt us, once we are herd members. Bonding with the horse and learning how to communicate with each horse is so important.

There are horses that are more timid, communicating with them can require a little more finesses but it is amazing to see them gain confidence through clear, quiet communication.

Horses that are more outgoing and maybe even aggressive, require more confidence and "louder" communication. Timing is so important to really show them that you are a partner and can be trusted to lead.

If we let our horses, they will teach us how to relax, breath, ride. In the time since my accident, I have learned so much about my own courage, my fears, and the things that work for me to gain courage. (I share this journey back to courage in my book if you would be interested in reading the whole story, click here). When I get on, if I tense up, I can feel them tense up. I can practice breathing, especially, exhaling, to calm me and feel the horse calm too. I started out with taking four steps. I felt like I was on cloud nine after those first four steps back. Sounds silly, but it was huge for me.

As we build our courage, it will carry over to all areas of our lives. I have become braver in all areas of my life. I am more confident with work, with speaking up for me, with sharing my fears and my successes with others to help them along. I never would have written two books if it wasn't for this amazing journey back to courage and this was enabled by my horses. wasn't for this amazing journey back to courage and this was enabled by my horses.

If you have enjoyed this blog, and would like to be part of a support community, you can join here!

Read Older Posts Read Newer Posts

Hey there! I’m Elise Hittinger—Fear Slayer, Confidence Creator, and your go-to Courage Coach.

Once upon a time, I was that fearless kid riding deep into Angeles National Forest without a second thought. Then bam—life threw me a plot twist. A horse flipped on me, pinning me beneath it, and fear crept in like an uninvited guest who wouldn’t leave.

That moment tested everything. But here’s the wild part—I walked away with only bruises and a divine reminder that I wasn’t done yet. Fear may have stolen my joy for a while, but it did not get the final say.

Fast forward to a move to Kentucky, where the trails were calling my name. I had two choices: let fear keep the reins or take them back. Spoiler alert—I took them back. Now, I help other riders (and, honestly, anyone sick of fear running their life) do the same.

I make fear pack its little bags and GTFO. Whether it’s through hypnotherapy, NLP, or a little well-placed humor, I help people trade anxiety for confidence, doubt for courage, and overthinking for action.

So, if you’re ready to kick fear to the curb and rediscover the joy you deserve—I’m here for it. Let’s do this.

Contact